Stanley Okorie Opens Up On Reason For Failed Marriage
Popular Nigerian Veteran Nollywood soundrack artiste, Stanley Okorie, has shed light on the issues that led to the failure of his first two marriages.
Speaking with media personality, Chude Jideonwo, the veteran opened up on how his first two marriages went down the drain and he spoke on how he contributed mostly to the failure of the marriages.
He stated that in his first marriage, he failed to be observant enough which made him seem like a person who did not care and this affected his relationship with his first wife who felt he didn't care about her, but his business alone.
He said;
“My first divorce was the most painful. You know, the first cut is always the deepest. I have my own share of blame. Most people, when they talk about their problems in a marriage or a relationship, are quick to highlight the other person’s faults. I’m not saying I was entirely at fault, but I was a very insensitive husband. I blame myself for that one.
“I wasn’t a caring husband. Sometimes, if my wife did her hair, I’d say, ‘I’m going to the studio, come ooo.’ No, that’s not nice. I wouldn’t remember her birthday because there was a time I was doing all the job [Nollywood soundtracks], and people would call me from London, pay for my ticket, and I would go and do the music. I thought providing for the family was enough. But sometimes, the first rule of love is presence. You can give all the money, but the first rule of love is presence.
He further revealed how he earned so much, but still his wife was not moved by the money he dropped for her before going to work, but instead craved his attention which he failed to provide and that made his first marriage to hit the rocks.
He said;
“My first wife wasn’t after money. Sometimes, when I gave her money, I’d return to find the money on the table. I was very busy with music, going from studio to studio. So when I look back, I see that’s the cost. Everything comes at a cost. Economists call it opportunity cost. In my first marriage, I was very, very insensitive. If I had been more mature—of course, I married very young—I wondered why she wasn’t seeing all the work I was doing. I failed on that score.
The first day she looked at me and said, ‘I can’t take this anymore,’ I knew she was telling the truth, so I didn’t want to argue. Instead of going to beg her, I was singing stupid songs to console myself.
Speaking on the second marriage, he described how it was something he didn't enjoy, as he lost his wife and son to the cold hands of death and he became lonely which made him to start singing some songs that made him find solace. He stated that even though he used music, he was not still happy, as he had to face his problem before he could get peace.
He said;
“After that, I went through a second divorce. At some point, my wife died. My son died. Some of the songs I sing were my escape from my sad reality, and they helped me deal with it to some level. But I tell you, there’s no method of dealing with a problem better than confronting the problem. So music wasn’t fair to me on that score. I was using it as an escape instead of confronting my problems. Some things that delight you today will, at some point, hurt. So that’s how it’s been a blessing and a curse. But I’m happy now where I am. I’m happily married with kids, doing well and still recording music.”
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