Where is the Police when you need them?
Sorry, excuse me, they are up and about in the streets of Nigeria harrassing and racketeering the helpless citizens they are supposed to protect. Never mind.
I, Eagle Eye, make a citizen arrest right this minute, in the name of the Nigerian people to put an end to this walking wahala.
Ayo Mogaji, my sister, how could you fold those 4 bellies and thunder thighs under that tiny stretch dress? Sister, please, I beg you to take yourself home, search your closets for African attires that would make you the regal Queen that you can be if you used some common sense.
And please, please, don't spill or drop anything on your way out. Nonsense!

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