That Olubayo Adefemi, Nigeria's Super Eagles ace defender is dead is no longer news. He died in an auto crash last Monday in Greece where he played professional football. Now, the nation mourns. CHRIS KAYODE and ANDREW EKEJUIBA went on the trail of his family and fiancée whom he would have married next month. The duo spoke with his mother Mrs Esther Titilayo Adefemi, sisters Bukola and Bunmi, uncle and heartthrob, Sade Adesina where they revealed many sides of the international footballer hitherto unknown to many.

EVERYONE KNOWS US BECAUSE OF BAYO – Mum

Mrs Esther Titilayo Adefemi lost her husband on 2 December, 2000. He was a soldier and he died in service. The young widow then was left to take care of five kids singlehandedly. Fate smiled on her, one of them, Olubayo, became a professional footballer of international status. A few days to his wedding however, the 25-year-old star dropped. She spoke with Saturday Mirror. Excerpts:

When last did you speak with Olubayo?

He called recently. He never disclosed when he would be coming home. His actions were mostly spontaneous. Once he said something he wanted it followed with action. Just like a soldier. The day he was to show me his wife was just like that. He called me at the middle of a church service. And I protested. But his response was that couldn't I leave the service for that day after all I would attend another time.

Was that the only time you saw his wife?

Yes that was the only time.

Where is she from?

They said she is from Ibadan.

As things are now, have you spoken with her, has she come? What is the situation?

She called her husband's elder sister and others too have been in touch with her. Later they said she was unconscious and could not talk. I had instructed them again to get in touch with her this morning.

What position was Olubayo?

He was the second to the last.

Was he the only footballer?

Yes, though his elder brother too was a footballer, he was not a professional.

What do you do madam?

I am a business woman. But they know us well. Even if you had asked for Adefemi House, they would have directed you here. Bayo even sent his younger sister to Abeokuta at the weekend. She schools in Ibadan. He was not in the habit of announcing his home coming. He might have got to Abuja before calling saying, “Mummy, cook rice for me. I dey come o. I don reach Abuja”. If I should query him on the lateness of informing me of his arrival, he would just say,” don't worry jare. I say make u na cook rice. I beg do it.” He loved speaking in Pidgin English. You know he was raised in the barracks so he was used to that type of language. It was in Abeokuta that those Bayo sent his sister to meet stylishly directed her back to Lagos. She tried arguing with them, they told her he was the one who asked her to return home. So she complied.

'GROWING UP WITH BAYO WAS FUN BUT TOUGH'

Mrs Bukola Adeite is Olubayo's immediate elder sister. The business woman mother of two was distraught. Days before his death Bayo as she called him had called asking her to help buy the clothing materials he would wear for Easter. She also recalled some fond memories of the time shared with her brother Excerpts:

What was your relationship with him?

He was my immediate younger brother. We were very close.

When last did you speak?

We spoke last on Sunday. And that was when he told me to help go to the market and buy expensive Guinea brocade and lace materials that he would wear for Easter.

Have you bought them?

No. I wanted to go on Monday but something just held me back and I promised myself that I would go on Tuesday.

Did you know he was coming to Nigeria?

He just said maybe. But he told my husband he would be coming. He however told my husband not to tell anybody, that he wanted to make it a surprise visit. When I spoke with him on Friday, he said he might come. But on Sunday, he just told me to buy the cloth for him.

Where are you from?

We are from Shagamu in OgunState. But we grew up in Mayon Barracks, Yaba, near Yaba College of Technology.

How was growing up with Olubayo like?

It was very tough. When we were much younger we used to quarrel a lot. But when we grew up we became best of friends. He became a part of me. And that is how I feel now, like a part of me has died. He cracked a lot of jokes. For example when my mum was eating and he asked for a piece of meat or some part of the food and she refused and he would just bust into a song like agbagba jeun ku fomode, iya e jeun ku fun mi o. He was also very close to my first child. He had a pet name for him. He called him “Abija”.

How did you get the news?

On Monday morning, people just started calling me asking when last I spoke with Bayo. I was just thinking what could have happened. Then one guy told me that it seemed that he was involved in an accident. I just waved it off and rejected it in my heart. Then I called his phone but the person who picked it was not speaking the English language. I now asked him to give the phone to the owner. But he switched off the phone. So I put on the television set and put it on a news channel. Not quite long after, they beamed it and said” Olubayo Adefemi dies in auto crash”.

What about his fiancée?

She is alright. We have spoken with her.

Is it true that they had held the introduction ceremony?

No, we have not done anything. We were planning to do everything together. And that would have been probably next month. He had called my husband to ask whether it was possible for a wedding ceremony to be organised and done within a week. He had then assured Bayo that it was possible. Again he warned my husband to keep this to his chest and not tell anybody since he aimed to make it a surprise to everyone.

What she would miss about him?

Everything. He was a cheerful giver. He did not like people wearing long faces anywhere around him and he would promptly attend to the person's need. Every year he was always giving me money to buy a new GSM handset whether I needed it or not. He will be missed every day and forever.

'WE WERE TO GET MARRIED NEXT MONTH'

My name is Sade Adesina. I am from Ibadan, the Oyo State capital. I don't know exactly where in Ibadan. I was in Ibadan last year. The first time I heard, I thought it was a joke. I thought maybe they wanted to test my love for him. I never believed. Even up till now I still cannot believe that it is true. I did not believe the first person who told me.

Who was that?

My pastor. His name is Pastor Kola. I attend CAC . It was a rude shock and I am still trying to get myself out of it.

What kind of person was he?

He is a very nice person and down to earth. It you are a person who loves hearing the truth, just talk to Bayo. He is always saying the truth.

When did you meet?

We met last July.

How did you meet?

We met through Facebook. First we became friends and from there the relationship started.

What are the qualities you saw in him especially after you have met?

He is always truthful. He says things as they are and as he sees them. If you want to listen to the truth about yourself just talk to Bayo. If you are yellow and wants to be told you are green, do not bother speaking with Bayo. But if you are yellow and you want to hear that, then you may speak someone like him.

Are you a student?

Yes I am a student of Moshhod Abiola Polytechnic, Ogun State. I study Mass Communication. I entered in 2005 and finished my OND programme in 2007. Now I am in the HND class.

Is it true you are getting married next week?

No not really. We are supposed to do our introduction this week and the wedding proper next month. May 26 to be precise. We have already deposited for our own apartment. It is at Rose Garden Estate, Imosan around Abesan in Lagos.

Is his family aware of this?

Yes.

Have you got in touch with his family?

Is it after his death? Yes. We have spoken. They have been calling me to console me.

How would you describe yourself ?

I am a care free person. I am just like Bayo, when Isee the truth I say it. I go after the truth.

Do you play football?

No. I do not. But I love football.

Which of the clubs do you support or belong to?

No, I am not into that club thing. I just love the game. But since I have been dating Bayo, I have been trying to pay more attention to the game especially his club side. I try to follow if they would call him to the Super Eagles camp or not.

Have you been to Greece?

No.

So you only see when he comes home?

Yes.

When last was that?

We saw last when he came for the match with Kenya. The Kenya match was March 27. I was supposed to go to see him but we cancelled it and he later came.

Did he come to Lagos?

No. After that one there was another match. That was on a Tuesday. He could not come after the match of March 27. He said the coach did not allow him. He came after the second match.

If you were given an opportunity to make an appeal to the powers that be on what you should be done for him, what would you say?

Bayo has always wanted a Foundation for widows and a football academy. When I asked me why he had not done it, he said he would love to have a personal web site first. And that from there he would take off. He said he just wanted to have it like that. I think that has been his dream. He probably he wanted a foundation for the widow may be because of what his mother went through when the father died. I want the Federal Government to please look into that. If they could do that for Adefemi Olubayo, I think he would be happy wherever he may be. I think that those are the things he would have wished to accomplish in his life time. God knows best for terminating his dreams and aspirations and the things he wanted to do.

'HE WOULD HAVE TAKEN ME'

Olubumi Adefemi is a student of Psychology at the University of Ibadan, Ibadan. She is a third year student and stays off campus at the great university city of Ibadan. She spoke last with Olubayo in his immediate family. She is Olubayo's immediate younger sister and baby of the house. Looking unkempt and starry eyed, she was keeping mostly to herself. It took some time before she agreed to speak with us.

Excerpts:

When last did you speak with him?

It was on Sunday evening. He had asked me to go to Abeokuta on Saturday to do some things. On Sunday evening around 8 o'clock he called again to explain to me how I would go about doing what he had asked me to do for him in Abeokuta.

What was that he asked you to go and do?

He asked to go and do some things. (After some petting and cajoling, she added) He asked to go and collect my international passport and give it to someone there.

What for?

It was to enable me travel with him to Greece when he would be going back.

Have you met his fiancée?

No. But she had met my elder brother and sisters. She only came to our house here just once. But Bayo usually told me about her a lot. So it is as if I've known her for a long time.

What do you call him?

I called him Bayuu but when I really want to tease him I call him Bayu's Scorpion.

How would you miss him?

I will miss him every day, every minute. Bayo is my everything, my all. He and our elder brother, Biodun, were the ones footing my bills in terms of school fees, clothing, feeding and all. When we had one holiday and I told him I wanted to work, he refused. He was very angry asking me why I wanted to work and whether he had not been taking care of all my needs. He was like that. He might just call or send an sms; “just to check on you”. And that could be in any time of the day. He was a man of few choice words. I will miss him sorely. When we were much younger we did fight a lot. My mum would just shift the table to a side and say, “now this is a field.” But interestingly, as much as we would fight or he would beat me, he would not let any other person touch me. He was always protecting me.