Hot Issues | 21 April 2013 10:42 CET

If Your Marriage Is Not Working, Get Out Fast! - Joke Silva


The screen goddess said this in an interview with Nollywood Insider when she was asked about the rate of divorce in Nollywood.

She said:

“Is the rate of divorce in Nollywood worse than in other industries? Have you taken a census of what is happening with lawyers, doctors and nurses? You don't know. Everyone just blames the movie industry because we are the ones in the limelight.

Long surviving marriage is not exceptional in this industry. The thing is that, we are the ones that people know. Sony Irabor and Betty; John Momoh and Shola; and Bayo Oduneye have been married much longer. What of the late Justus and his wife? We have marriages that have stood the test of time just like you will find in other professions.

For me, since you love the person you get married to, both of you should work at it together. See it as your main responsibility once you get married.

Even before you get married, you should ask yourself, am I capable of making this person my total responsibility? That, am I willing to dedicate my time to making this person happy? It is a two way thing; it is not only the woman that is supposed to make the man happy, it is also for the man to make the woman happy. It is the two of you together and when you do that, it will work out well.

But if not, I don`t support emotional hardship just because you want to marry. God forbid bad thing! If it is not working, get out fast. If you don't know where you are going, you should know where you are coming from.”

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mrs Akudo
4/21/2013 3:27:22 AM
Lana jerry
4/21/2013 3:34:14 AM
Hwfar ad hm body nah?. As 4 silver jokes,i jump ad pass dix post b4 her ghost looking blind ma eyes o!.
mrs Akudo
4/21/2013 4:21:44 AM
Lana dude how u dey? Longest time. How every every? Ghana nko?
4/21/2013 8:39:50 AM
Good one! You hv said it all. It is the responsibility of both man and woman. Not just woman alone.
It is better to get out out, than die in it.

Well said.
4/22/2013 2:17:46 AM
Well said ma, marriage isn't a do or die affair, if it's not working get out while u are still alive.
4/22/2013 1:35:51 AM
Nicely said.i couldnt agree more
Chief A
4/21/2013 3:35:32 PM
akuodo, i hear you have fine daughters, can I you give me one of them to jackhammer? I will give you plenty money.
4/21/2013 3:37:59 AM
I didn't read dat long essay but if that's what she can advice her
female children then, u are not a gud mother abeg #nuffsaid
Lana jerry
4/21/2013 6:24:04 AM
5n 5n 5n o,ghana is gr8.greet ur little baby 4 me 4 man looking silver jokes, she is rilly cracking jokes 4 us o.i still jump ad pass these post.
4/22/2013 1:56:37 PM
she has said it all. u myt think it dont make sense but it really does. wat some women go thru in d hands of dis men called husbands is sad.
4/21/2013 3:45:35 AM
is this woman ok, or she is getting out of hand. pls what u re saying can not help us the young women, that means woman do what u want, if your hausband says any nonsense pack & go. pls if u dont ve anything to say just close that thing u call mouth.
4/21/2013 3:46:39 AM
I suport u wella,some one cant b sufferin nd pretend 2 b fine,so wat i mean is dat if yr marriage is not workin beta get out bf u get hypertension nd die ,so my dear joke silver i support u full time
4/21/2013 4:26:35 AM
This absolutely condentrupovious and stupenduferous
4/21/2013 4:30:50 AM
Yesterday my cousine sister was buried because she want her marriage to work, since she got married it was not working and her parents want her back but she said no how can she be a divorcee, now she is no more August this year will make it one year she got married. So in some cases divorce is the best.
4/21/2013 4:50:57 AM
Do you want to tell me your married has been bed of rosy? s****d woman
4/21/2013 8:59:05 AM
leave her alone
4/21/2013 9:36:35 AM
Emotional hardship indeed.
4/21/2013 9:55:10 AM
I can see that this NFC is full of i***ts without respect, how can people that read from their nose be cursing this intelligent woman for saying the truth.
4/21/2013 9:57:39 AM
It is vry true evn d bible said d same tin instd of dying in a marriage dey shld seprate,it is nt a do or die tin
4/21/2013 10:15:13 AM
Most of you are so stupiid. What she said is absolutely spot on. Most of you retarded fhools should learn to live beyond slavery. Why do you have to tie down your life to make someone else happy in the name of marriage? It is a two way thing and so must it be or everyone moves on. Gooosh, what a bunch of uncivilized people are you all. The day the nigerian women start to prove that they can live without men then that would have been a giant step for a better life in that country. This lady spoke like an elder. Marriage my ass.
4/21/2013 10:50:47 PM
Very well said indeed
Marriage or Mirage.
I really don't know why some
Women bother.
Domestic servants with icing.
4/21/2013 10:31:22 AM
yes she is correct ,but our African culture supports marriage& a woman loose respect & look irresponsible once she is not under any man & jumping 4rm one marriage 2 another is c*** pls women marry d men dat loves u more Dan u do,so dat d man can stand d test of time & make ur marriages work.
4/21/2013 1:42:56 PM
That might be probably true and it is high time you fellows chose to stop enslaving yourselves simply because you feel you will be irresponsible. The question mark is why wouldn't the men also look irresponsible after divorce? Life is just one shot and you live it once. Choose wisely.
4/21/2013 12:03:44 PM
People often make mistakes from the beginning. Why do you want to get married, you must settle that first, secondly who does God want you to marry, and I expect criticism from the point but it doesn't matter. Who God wants you to marry matters a lot because He has seen the end of your life before you even began. As a master planner, He already told us about the end of the world even from ages ago. Hence we have Genesis and Revelations in the same book. That can only be done by a master planner.So a person must discover who God wants not who his parents, siblings and feelings want. Marriage has it's ups and downs if you didn't start with God, how do you approach God in crises, and I expect someone to come up with a comment saying pastors are even divorcing. Can I answer that real quick. Not even all pastors got it right from the beginning. May God help us all, Pastors too are human and they can make mistakes. It's funny how people say, 'we are married because he loves me' what if he stops loving you. Marriage ought to have the God factor, commitment factor and mentality factor. If your guy or woman believes in divorce forget it, whenever anything howbeit little,that's the end. The person will file for irreconcilable differences as if you were made exactly the same way in the first place, of course irreconcilable differences should be expected. I don't want to underestimate the fact that some things just happen to some people unexpectedly or the other one just decided to change from his former self. This is where prayer comes in. Marriage is hard work, you work it out like a full time job by God's grace
4/21/2013 1:38:44 PM
i just cannot waste any more time to read beyond the third sentence of what you wrote. Marriage only changes your single status. It shouldn't enslave you. Come on people.
Taiwo Idowu NY
4/22/2013 9:26:51 AM
What culture?.Some marriages are broken beyond repair.Should a man or a woman stay in an abusive marriage?.I don't think so.Most nigeria men don't treat their wives with respect anyway.They still think women are inferior and that whatever is done to them,they should suck it up.Chibuzo was right on the money.Get out before you kick the bucket.Another point is this,it is easy for Joke to say this because she is advace and know what is going on.What about the millions illiterates that are married but unhappy,and being abusive and think that is the way it suppose to be until they are killed.Joke should start a program to help some victims that they have options.Even if only one life that is save,it is worth the effort.So Joke,you are on.Being alone and happy is better than being married and miserable.Why make someone else happy?What about you?.Your happiness comes first.
4/21/2013 12:48:48 PM
I wonder why people are criticizing this woman for saying the truth. I think marriage is for two people who are interested in it. If one party does not want the marriage there is nothing the other can do to keep it.
4/21/2013 2:00:37 PM
NO BE DO OR DIE O!!! But actresses own too much!!! Una too dey f**k anyhow!
4/21/2013 2:22:54 PM
I used to have so much respect for this lady but it's reduced drastically. What happened to God and prayers? If we are talking about physical assault then it's a different thing. I expect her first advice should be prayers and counseling and if that doesn't work then you can think about another solution. Nobody deserves to go through emotional stress but life itself isn't perfect and I don't think any marriage is, even hers. If everybody begins to break up because of emotional stress then how many marriages will stand?. God bless you, I still love you.
Michelle Obama
4/21/2013 7:25:31 PM
100% correct even me and my hubby argue heavily at times.Prayers is the key people,politics aside
4/26/2013 11:14:31 AM
Has your husband ever used hot pressing iron on you, or killed your baby for money ritual, always infect with stds, married another woman when you did nothing to him, pour hot water on you intentionally, etc skin just because ur having misunderstanding? And you stayed because you don't want to answer divorcee. I don't just like it when people that has not seen anything wag their mouth anyhow
love them
4/21/2013 4:42:46 PM
Very true mama silver joke. But went I got merry to ma husband I didn't love him. It was an arrangement from ma family & his. So I accept because I didn't want ma family to be upset at me. I didn't want or expect anything to happened in our marriage. I want us to be together until whenever god take one us. Now he dosent treat me well. He beats me All the time & he doesn't work. Am the one who's working. We have 3 kids. & ma father isn't longer live. I talk to ma mum but she said. It was ur father & Ur uncles that did the wedding if I said something now Ur uncles will be very angry at me. So go talk to Ur uncles. Went i went talk to them as ma mum said. Nobody was even ready to take responsibility. They all run there & there. No one really want to even take time to listened to me. So Mr.s Jacobs. What should I do mama?! & we even live in USA. If I do something now. They will say it because of freedom in US. I don't really know what to do mama. Help me with an idea. I will come back to check if u reply ma msg. Thank u. I love u & Mr. Jacobs very much. God will bless u with Ur family.
4/22/2013 5:04:28 AM
first, thanks for ur honesty, get out of that horible marriage of family choice, ur mum is not in the marriage u are,please sister get out as soon as possible, is better to be alive to take care of ur children b4 ur kids inherit his unspeakable behaviour. God is good and does not wish us harm.
Read 1 Tim 1:7. if u r not in Christ please accept Him as ur Lord and personal Savior,Christ wants u be happy. Note: there is no marriage in Heaven, get out he is an animal if u what u said is truth because some play the victim but God knows!
ben louis swiss
4/21/2013 8:58:10 PM
I always advicing the young one,,please if you ever wish and wanted to have a happy family,home ,please keep ur family away from the internet world,,or else,,hehehe,,u must come back here to complain,alots of confused person are here,and right here
Olutoyin Ogunmu
4/21/2013 10:30:39 PM
Are you still Joke Jacobs or Joke Silver?
Olutoyin Ogunmu
4/21/2013 10:34:36 PM
Are you still Joke Jacobs or Joke Silver?
Olutoyin Ogunmu
4/21/2013 10:49:45 PM
Are you still Joke Jacobs or Joke Silva
Olutoyin Ogunmu
4/21/2013 10:51:35 PM
Are you still Joke Jacobs or Joke Silva?
4/22/2013 11:17:43 AM
4/26/2013 11:23:53 AM
Has your husband ever used hot pressing iron on you, or killed your baby for money ritual, always infect with stds, married another woman when you did nothing to him, pour hot water on you intentionally, etc skin just because ur having misunderstanding? And you stayed because you don't want to answer divorcee. I don't just like it when people that has not seen anything wag their mouth anyhow

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