Nollywood At Large | 4 June 2013 05:22 CET

MONALISA, LANRE NZERIBE, EGOR & OTHER STORIES. BULL'S EYE

By JOSEPH SAMPSON EDGAR

Me I don't see what these women see in this Lanre fellow o. I saw him the other day at Cafe Tranche and took my time to study him well. I came out of that session indifferent. I envy him sha, cos that Monalisa girl is a beauty.

The other day, I also saw Monalisa. A damsel with a wonderful skin and luscious lips. Fragile and svelte. So when I saw Lanre, the Disney movie,'Beauty and the beast came to mind.

I really do not know Lanre's claim to fame. I have always wondered why there is so much interest in him and his love life. Even if he has dated a mixture of fine women and forgettable ones, I still do not believe that he deserves all these attention. His mates are changing lives, positively influencing society and creating employment. But for my Egbon, each time his name is mentioned it's over one mature MILF or a gorgeous one like Monalisa.

This testimony by friend of the family is another matter entirely. This great PR work is so wonderful in it's stupidity that I cringed as I read. Let Mona who is enjoying the fruits of the romance be the one to tell us what she is enjoying in the romance. That is if we are even interested in listening. The rate at which we waste our time on frivolity is really amazing.

Time is going o. We would soon all start welcoming our grandchildren o. So we should all engage in more productive things, rather than interest ourselves with whose one that Lanre is dating. Cos from what I have read so far, he still has a lot more to do before arthritis gets to his tongue.

From the write up, I saw that Mona suffered physical abuse, Pele o. If I had known, I would have jumped in and saved her. There is nothing worse than beating up a woman, especially a 'yellow' woman. The skin will turn red and when the colour is artificially aided with cream, you will see a conflagration of colours. Green, yellow, blue and black. It's not funny o. With that Mona's colour, you will just see the South African flag all over her skin.

We thank God, that Lanre the well known defender of the universe had flown in to the rescue. His job is cut out for him. He has to be close to all the Chemist on the Island, cos he must not joke with the supply of creams and from the write up by the great family friend, Lanre is up to the task.

Well, Mona darling, should you ever get tired of Lanre, which I am sure you will, please do not hesitate to contact me through this platform. I have a data base of guys, better suited at taking care of women of your colour.

Egor, I will need you to write a testimonial on me so I can send to my partner who still cannot see my good sides despite all the Affang and Ngwo-Ngwo I have been buying.

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